Narcissism is a psychological condition with a wide range of symptoms. As parents, narcissistic people may display traits such as great self-importance and regard their children as extensions of themselves. Children in narcissistic families may not comprehend the impact of their parents’ conduct until later on in life. Scroll down to gain a deeper insight into what is a narcissistic family and narcissistic parent sign.
The Narcissistic Family Dynamics
In simple terms, a narcissistic family system is one where the parents’ wants are prioritized and the kids are supposed to meet those demands in various ways. The healthy family paradigm is flipped on its head in order to help their parents rather than the development of the children. There is abuse and a matching denial of the abuse, just as there is in other types of narcissistic families. Secrecy, neglect, high expectations, a lack of empathy, contempt for limits, and continual conflict are also present.
Narcissistic Parent Signs
Acceptance Is Requisite
Children must conform to the family story and value system in order to be accepted. Differentiated expressions are shunned and pathologized.
The Kids Must Submit the Work
Everyone is obliged to publish to the dominating narcissist’s authority, regardless of how stupid, arbitrary, cruel, or harmful it is.
They Blame Their Kids
Someone must be held responsible for anything unpleasant that occurs, from a loss of a job to a dropped glass of milk. A family scapegoat is usually chosen to suffer the brunt of the family’s troubles, frustrations, and misery, as well as the dominating narcissist’s projected self-loathing.
Vulnerability Poses a Risk
Mistakes, mishaps, and shortcomings, even those for which people accept responsibility, might result in years of demeaning treatment.
You Have to Choose Sides
There will always be sides, just as there are always blame and guilt and one is wrong if they are not on a dominant narcissist’s side. Children frequently feel compelled to choose between their parents, brothers, and other relatives.
There will Never be Enough Love or Respect
Respect and love are limited in healthy families to the narcissistic and whatever else is judged worthy, usually a favourite “golden” child. Respect for one person entails disdain for the other.
Do Narcissists Love their Children?
Lofty hopes for their sons are common among narcissistic mothers. They treat their son somewhat like a loving relationship in extreme circumstances as if the youngster ought to be able to come to terms with the emotional baggage. They might say something like, “You’re the only man I need.” While narcissistic parents may or may not love their children, their behaviour and traits often make the kids experience a lack of love.
What are the Effects of Narcissistic Parenting on Children?
- The youngster will not believe that he or she is being heard or noticed.
- The feelings and realities of the youngster will be ignored.
- Instead of being treated as a person, the kid will be treated as an asset to the parent.
- The child will indeed be appreciated more for what they accomplish (typically again for parents) than that for who and what they are as individuals.
- The youngster would grow up with severe self-doubt because they will never learn to recognize or trust their own feelings.
- It will be instilled in the child that how they appear is much more significant than just how they feel.
- Instead of teaching the youngster, that authenticity is more essential than appearance, the child will be educated that appearance is more important.
‘Does narcissism run in families?’ has a much clear answer after taking a look at the aforesaid signs. When addressed to somebody who is just arrogant, and all about themselves, a narcissistic personality disorder is often misinterpreted. While these characteristics are uncomfortable and unpleasant to talk about, a narcissistic family has devastating consequences for the children.
If you think your family shows signs of narcissism, it’s recommended to seek counselling. Contact Ellen Star Counselling at 416-488-3102 and fix your appointment for individual counselling or couples counselling to deal with the situation better.