Finding out you are pregnant and sharing this news with your partner can have different outcomes. Sometimes you or your partner may not be initially thrilled about the news. Other times, you both can be equally excited about starting a family, but still could have concerns.
The support from a Toronto couples counsellor, like myself, Ellen Starr, can be helpful if either you or your partner have concerns about the pregnancy or even after the birth of your child. Five other reasons it is recommended to seek counselling include:
1. The pregnancy is putting a strain on your relationship.
The pregnancy can be a source of relationship problems, especially if the pregnancy was not planned. You and your partner may have different life goals, where you may want children and your partner does not or is not ready to have a child. As such, you could find you are arguing with your partner more.
Even if the pregnancy was planned, if there were already relationship issues that have not been addressed, adding a future child into the relationship could potentially have a negative result. The birth of the child could cause you and your partner to drift further apart because you still need to resolve current issues and concerns.
2. You and your partner have financial concerns.
Financial worries are common during pregnancy. If you are already struggling to make ends meet, the added costs the baby will bring could create unwanted anxiety and stress. In cases where one person is not going to be able to work for a period of time, this could impact future income levels and alter current lifestyles, which one or both people are not always entirely sure they are ready to handle.
3. You are having problems coping with the physical changes of being pregnant.
Some women have difficulties dealing with all the physical changes their bodies go through while being pregnant. They might not be able to deal with morning sickness, insomnia, fatigue, body aches and pains, and other changes without it affecting their moods.
4. You have health concerns.
If you have a family history of certain genetic disorders, it is not uncommon to worry about whether these could affect your baby. Even with modern tests, there are still risks to having the tests performed.
5. Your partner’s sexual needs are not being met.
It is not uncommon for men to feel their sexual needs are not being met during pregnancies. This can become a common argument topic of contention between the couple. If not addressed in a caring and supportive environment, some men may seek sexual release elsewhere outside of the relationship, and only create further problems for the couple. There are ways for the couple to still enjoy sexual intimacy during the pregnancy, which you can learn about through counselling.
If you have any of the above concerns or others about your pregnancy, help is available from me, Ellen Starr. Contact my office at (416) 488-3102 to schedule an initial consultation appointment today!
